


A Cold and Broken Hallelujah

by AVeryBlueGirl



Series: A Thousand Years [3]
Category: X-Men (Movies), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Always a Different Sex, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Always a girl!Charles Xavier, Canon Disabled Character, Charles-centric, Charlotte Xavier - Freeform, Children, Emotionally Crippled Erik Is Fun To Read, F/M, Genderswap, Paralysis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-09
Updated: 2012-09-27
Packaged: 2017-11-13 22:17:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/508289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AVeryBlueGirl/pseuds/AVeryBlueGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Years later, Erik still had not given up his stance with mutant rights. Neither had Charlotte Xavier. But now Erik and his Brotherhood are posed to strike against humans and Charlotte has no choice but to fight him.<br/>Love isn't easy. Love isn't always kind. More often than not, the only thing it brings Charlotte is loneliness and regret. That doesn't mean she's given up on it yet.<br/>Or on Erik.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Secret Chord

 

_"I've heard there was a secret chord_   
_That David played, and it pleased the Lord_   
_But you don't really care for music, do you?_   
_It goes like this:_   
_The fourth, the fifth_   
_The minor fall, the major lift._   
_The baffled king composing Hallelujah…"_

**~ "Hallelujah", Leonard Cohen  
**

* * *

"Erik."

The man stopped at her voice. _Charlotte_ , he thought in greeting. "What are you doing here?" she asked.

He didn't turn. "Why do you ask questions to which you already know the answer?" he asked. Exhaustion filled his voice.

"Don't give up on them, Erik," she said, quietly pleading.

"What would you have me do, Charlotte?" he asked bitterly. "I've heard these arguments before."

She frowned. "That was a long time ago. Mankind has evolved since then."

It had been years since they had last communicated; they had kept up their letters for many years until the 'war' (as he called it) began. In one fight, Azazel had been killed and neither had the time nor resources to continue a clandestine correspondence. Charlotte had not seen him in person in so many years…

"Yes," Erik agreed, still not daring to look at her. ( _The sight of her wheelchair always did cause a torrent of guilt._ ) "Into us." After a moment, his hand went to his temple. _Charlotte_ , he thought warningly. "Are you sneaking around in here? What ever are you looking for, Charlotte?"

Finally, he turned to face her. His face, so weathered and weary, so many years later, was a hard mask. His hair was a shock of white and grey now, but otherwise very much the same. She so seldom saw him face to face, even more rarely without his helmet.

"I'm looking for hope," she replied calmly, sincerely.

He nodded. "I will bring you hope, Liebling, and I will ask only one thing in return: don't get in my way."

After a long moment, he touched his hat in goodbye and walked away. "We are the future, Charlotte. Not them," he called over his shoulder. "They no longer matter."

She watched him go with equal parts longing and worry.

Once he was gone, Charlotte Xavier pulled out her phone and dialed quickly.

"Storm," she said lowly but urgently. "We have a problem."

* * *

Later that evening, Sabretooth stormed into Magneto's office. Alone.

So he had failed. _Interesting._

"What happened?" Erik asked sharply.

"They knew."

 _Ah_. He moved his chair out from the desk and sat down. "Charlotte," he muttered with a self-berating edge to his words. Of course she had discovered it from his head. He should have assumed as much when they first spoke.

But…Sabretooth did not come completely empty handed. He carried with him a souvenir. Erik pulled the dog tags to him, inspecting them curiously. _Wolverine._ "Where is the mutant now?" he asked idly.

The shaggy mutant snarled. "With _them_."

Well. That _was_ a problem. "I have made the first move, that is all they know," he said mostly to himself. Tossing the dog tags onto his desk, he said to Sabretooth, "Come. The UN Summit is approaching. Time for our little test."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to gildatheplant who corrected me that Leonard Cohen wrote "Hallelujah"!


	2. From Your Lips

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A discussion on the Brotherhood and an introduction to Logan.
> 
> And the Professor's family.

  
_"…Your faith was strong but you needed proof_   
_You saw her bathing on the roof_   
_Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you_   
_She tied you to a kitchen chair_   
_She broke your throne, and she cut your hair_   
_And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah…"_   


**~ "Hallelujah", Leonard Cohen**

* * *

"I was tracking him when he left the Senate hearing but lost him. Likewise, Sabretooth escaped Pietro," Wanda explained with a frown. "We suspect his base is somewhere in New Jersey, but they're being exceptionally discreet."

Her brother snorted. "And that's really saying something, considering we're talking about the Brotherhood."

 _Dad never did manage subtlety with the Brotherhood_ , he thought with some measure of exasperation and frustration.

Despite herself, Charlotte chuckled softly.

Her twins were all grown up now; looking at them, weary from their search for the Brotherhood's compound, that fact was undeniable now. They were nearly thirty and that thought made the professor feel every year on her life weigh her down.

Wanda had red auburn hair and reminded Charlotte of herself when she was younger, though she had Erik's sharp wit and the same reserved nature. The Scarlet Witch, as she had been nicknamed because of her magic-like mutation and manipulation of probability, preferred small groups to crowds and had a calmly rational mind that her mother often considered the calm within a storm, especially during a fight.

Her brother Pietro had strangely white-blond hair that he liked to keep in spikes and looked much like his father, though Erik's sharp angles were softened in his face. He had, unfortunately, inherited his parents' arrogance and some of his father's aggressive tendencies. For his inhuman speed, he was called Quicksilver. Because of his impulsive nature, he often turned to Wanda or his mother for level-headedness.

They had grown up knowing who their father was and why it was something of a secret. Though they had met Erik often through their adolescence and adulthood, neither held much sympathy for his cause. Wanda understood why they had done what they had done, but Pietro regarded his father angrily (his mind always seemed to whisper _Do you care for your family so little? We're right here…Why can't you just forget fighting the humans and just come home to us? Do you really love us that little? Do you love us at all?_ ). Likewise, that anger sometimes spread toward Charlotte (along the lines of _Why waste your time waiting for him? Why do you love him? After all he's done—after Cuba, after your paralysis, after leaving, after everything—why? He doesn't deserve you or us—so why?_ ) He always referred to his father aloud as Magneto, unless he spoke of a time before Cuba, though he sometimes slipped and called him "Dad" in his mind or in private.

His sister understood why their parents acted as they did.

But that didn't mean she liked it any more than he did.

* * *

So Logan was back now, she mused as she monitored him psychically.

With half her attention on her class, she subtly guided him in the right direction until he burst right into her office.

"Good morning, Logan," she greeted calmly, startling him, before telling her students, "So, I'd like your definitions of weak and strong atomic particles on my desk tomorrow. That will be all. Have a good day."

They all filed out.

"Physics," she explained to Logan, holding up the textbook before introducing herself. "I'm Charlotte Xavier. Would you like some breakfast?"

He ignored her question to ask her own. "Where am I?"

"Westchester, New York," she explained, coming out from behind her desk. "You were attacked. My people brought you here for medical attention."

"I don't need medical attention," he said fiercely.

She chuckled dryly. "Yes, of course."

"Where is the girl?"

"Rogue?" she said. "She's here, she's fine. In fact, she's my newest student."

Storm, Scott, and Pietro's entrance cut off his next question. "Ah, Logan, I would like for you to meet Ororo Munroe, also called Storm. This is Scott Summers, also known as Cyclops, and Pietro Maximoff. They saved your life.

"And I believe you've already met Doctor Jean Grey, but that is Wanda Maximoff. You're in my school for the gifted, for mutants. You'll be safe here from Erik."

"Who's Erik?"

She smiled. "A very powerful mutant, usually known as Magneto, who believes that a war is coming between mutants and the rest of humanity. I've been following his activities for many years. The man who attacked you is an associate of his called Sabretooth."

"Magneto? Sabretooth?" he repeated skeptically. She nodded. He looked to Ororo. "Storm?" He looked back to the telepath. "What do they call you? Wheels?" He laughed. "This is the stupidest thing I've ever heard…And Cyclops, right? Wanna get out of my way?"

Scott looked to her.

"Logan," she barked. "It's been almost fifteen years, hasn't it? Living day to day, moving place to place, with no memory of who or what you are."

"Shut up," he spat.

"Give me a chance," she negotiated calmly. "I may be able to help you find answers." In fact, she already suspected several…

He looked at her, shaken but defensive anger rising. "How do you know?"

 _You're not the only one with gifts_ , she told him and smiled at the disbelief on his face.

"What is this place?"

"Anonymity is a mutant's first chance against the world's hostility," she explained. "To the public, we are merely a school for gifted youngsters. Cyclops, Storm, and Jean were some of my first students, Wanda and Pietro followed. I protected them, taught them to control their powers, and in time, teach others to do the same. The students are mostly runaways—frightened, alone. Some with gifts so extreme that they have become a danger to themselves and those around them. Much like your friend Rogue, incapable of physical human contact…probably for the rest of her life," she added sadly. "And yet here she is, with others her own age, learning, being accepted—not feared."

"What'll happen to her?" Logan asked.

He was protective of the girl, very quickly, it seemed. So the lone Wolverine made a friend. How peculiar.

"Well, that's up to her: rejoin the world as an educated young woman or stay on to teach others and become what the students affectionately call X-Men."

Charlotte would admit it. She was fond of the nickname, which stemmed from the students' preference of calling her Professor X. At the time, the six year old Wanda and Pietro had enthusiastically encouraged it. (Though he'd never admit it aloud, Pietro still loved the name.)

"But the school is merely our public face," she informed him. "The lower levels, however, are an _entirely_ different matter."

"When I was a girl, I discovered that I had the power to read and control people's minds, to make them think or do whatever I wanted. Soon after I earned my doctorate, I met a man my age known as Erik Lehnsherr. He too had an unusual power: he could create magnetic fields and control metal. Believing that humanity would never accept us, he grew angry and vengeful. He became Magneto," she said sadly and bitterly spat out the name.

In the background, the twins stiffened simultaneously at the name: a mannerism they had picked up long ago.

"There are mutants out there with incredible powers, Logan, and many who do not share my respect for mankind. If no one is equipped to oppose him, humanity's days could be over.

"I'll make a deal with you, Logan," she offered. "Give me forty-eight hours to discover what Erik wants with you and I give you my word that I will do everything in my power to help you piece together what you lost…and what you're looking for."

He nodded. "Fine. But no more than forty-eight hours."

"The metal is an alloy called adamantium, supposedly indestructible," Jean told them. "It's been surgically grafted to his entire skeleton."

 _Wouldn't Erik love to get his hands on a mutant like Logan,_ was her first thought.

"How could he have survived a procedure like that?" Pietro asked in confusion.

Jean knew the answer as well as Charlotte. "His mutation. He has uncharted regeneration capability, which enables him to heal rapidly. It also makes his age impossible to determine. He could be very well be older than you, Professor."

Charlotte chuckled. "Oh, yes, he is. I met him briefly in 1962," she recalled. "Though I knew he was a mutant, I had no idea of his abilities. It was when Er— _we_ were recruiting mutants for the first time. He looked very much the same, sans the metal. I believe he insulted us then propositioned me, but that may very well be a mistake of my memory," she added with a small smile.

Wanda rolled her eyes and Pietro let out a guffaw. Scott chuckled but then focused once more. "Who did this to him?"

"He doesn't know," Jean explained. "Nor does he remember anything about his life before it happened."

"Experimentation on mutants," the professor said contemptuously. "It's not unheard of, but I've never seen anything like this before."

She pushed back memories from others' minds— _of Shaw-Schmit in Auschwitz, torturing young Erik into forcing him to use his powers—of Stryker's base that they had rescued Erik, beaten black and blue, drugged to helplessness—of the experimentation Scott as a young boy had suffered there—of the tortures Cordelia Frost had withstood there for years—_

But none of the physical experimentation had really gone this far...

"What do you think Magneto wants with him?" Wanda asked quietly.

Charlotte made a note to look into that, aside from his metallic skeleton, but she focused.

"I'm not entirely sure it's him Erik wants."


	3. Not a Victory March

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A conversation between the telepath and magnetokinetic...

  
_"…Maybe I have been here before_   
_I know this room, I've walked this floor_   
_I used to live alone before I knew you_   
_I've seen your flag on the marble arch_   
_Love is not a victory march_   
_It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah_   
_Hallelujah, Hallelujah_   
_Hallelujah, Hallelujah…"_   


**~ "Hallelujah", Leonard Cohen**

* * *

"What are you looking for, Erik?" she pondered as she studied Logan's x-rays once more. "Strange. There are more powerful mutants out there; why should this one be so important?"

"Maybe it's his way with people," Scott muttered scathingly. Pietro grinned slightly.

Charlotte chuckled. "You don't like him." It was obvious to the headmistress, even if she wasn't a telepath. She could _see_ the vibes of dislike between the two men.

"How could you tell?" he asked wryly.

"Well, I am psychic, you know," the professor replied with a smile.

Logan and Storm hurried in abruptly. "Where is she?" Logan demanded.

"Who?" Scott asked. Charlotte's eyes widened as she scanned the school hurriedly. "Rogue...she's gone."

* * *

" _Welcome, Professor_ ," Cerebro's automated voice greeted her. She led Logan inside the vast room. "Welcome to Cerebro," she told him.

He was unimpressed. "Well, this certainly is a...big, round room."

"The brainwaves of mutants are different from average human beings," she explained patiently. "This device amplifies my powers, allowing me to locate mutants across great distances. That's how I intent to find Rogue."

"Why don't you just use it to find Magneto?"

Charlotte shook her head to him. "I've been trying, but he has a helmet that shields himself from telepaths and Cerebro."

Logan paused. "How would he know how to do that?"

She smiled, bittersweet memories coming to mind. "He was there when I first tried the original out. He watched and knew how it worked. He assisted when we discussed improvements to make," she replied but confessed, "He knows Cerebro nearly as well as I. Now if you'll excuse me..."

* * *

_MOTHER!_

The desperate mental scream made her jump. _Pietro? What's wrong?_

_Magneto's goons are at the train station, Mum! Storm, Scott, and I were ambushed! Logan came after Rogue anyways, they're after him—_

_I'll be there as soon as possible. Hold on._

"Jean, Wanda! We need to get to that train station _immediately_!"

* * *

The police were already there, outside, waiting when Erik and his two followers left the building. So were Charlotte, Jean, and Wanda, in a car behind all the police. The women sat in silence, watching from others' eyes.

"Alright, hold it! Hold it right there!" one of the policemen ordered. "Stay where you are and put your hands over your heads!"

She flinched at the mistake, knowing what was about to happen. Erik smiled from under the helmet and did as they asked. As he raised his hands, several police cars rose into the air as well, before dropping suddenly onto other cars. Charlotte watched as he flung their guns away too and turned them on the shocked police.

 _Erik, please don't do this_ , she thought to him, even though he didn't hear.

"You _Homo Sapiens_ and your guns," he mocked. And that was it.

Charlotte snatched at Sabretooth's mind, shoving her mind into his, throwing his control away as easily as Erik had thrown the guns. She did the same to Toad and forced Sabretooth to grab Erik's throat.

" _That's enough, Erik_ ," she/Sabretooth said.

Toad nodded. " _Let them go_."

He glanced at them before turning to look out at the cars. "Why don't you come out where I can see you, Charlotte?" he yelled.

" _What do you want her for?_ " she made Sabretooth say.

He smirked ever so slightly. "Can't you read my mind?" he asked ironically. "But now, to save the girl, you'll have to kill me, Charlotte."

The ultimatum made the professor grit her teeth. Damn him, he knew she wouldn't do that… Beside the professor, her daughter and Jean glanced at her in concern.

"And what will that accomplish?" he continued. "Let them pass that law and they'll have you in chains with a number burned into your forehead."

" _It won't be that way,_ " she replied calmly. She tried not to sound as if pleading.

Erik smirked. "Then kill me and find out." Charlotte pursed her lips. "No?" he asked when she did nothing. "Then release me."

Instead of replying, she made Toad walk away, carrying Rogue with him.

" _Fine_ ," he whispered and released the safety of one of the policemen's guns, pointing it to the man's head. And fired.

Bystanders screamed. Charlotte winced...

...but the bullet was levitating less than an inch from the man's head. _Just as easily as he stopped the bullet aimed for her head, so many years ago..._

"Care to push your luck, Charlotte?" he asked as the other guns' safety was turned off and the clicks of the guns were audibly threatening.

The telepaths' eyes met reluctantly.

"I don't think I can stop them all," he threatened.

Charlotte released his henchmen.

He chuckled. "Still unwilling to make sacrifices, Charlotte," he remarked derisively. "That's what makes you weak. Even after all these years." The professor winced at that.

Before anything more could be done, a helicopter landed—piloted by Raven.

"Goodbye, Charlotte," he called over his shoulder and they escaped.

 _Goodbye, Erik_ , she thought to herself and closed her eyes in failure.

 


	4. There Was a Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cerebro is sabotaged.  
> Charlotte is taken out of the equation.

  
_"…There was a time_   
_You let me know_   
_What's real and going on below_   
_But now you never show it to me, do you?"_   


**~ "Hallelujah", Leonard Cohen**

* * *

"Senator Kelly? I'm Professor Charlotte Xavier," she introduced herself quietly to the ill man.

His breathing was shallow as he replied, "I was afraid…if I went to the hospital…they would…" he trailed off uncomfortably.

"Treat you like a mutant?" she supplied. Kelly didn't meet her eyes.

"We're not what you think," Charlotte informed him gently. "Not all of us."

He gulped, straining to breath. "Tell that…to the ones who did this to me." From his mind, she caught a flash of Erik's face.

"Senator, I want you to try and relax," she told him, subtly calming his frightened mind as she put her hands on the sides of his head. "I'm not going to hurt you."

 _…emerging from the ocean—now fully aware that he was one of the_ things _he feared so much…the hating, fearing looks of people watching him on the beach…slipping through the cell bars to escape…a blinding light emanating from a strange machine…_

There.

_She dipped into that memory: Kelly, strapped to a chair, watching as Magneto used a fantastic machine. It hurt and left him smoking slightly. When it was over, Erik emerged—weak, slumped over. Raven went to him and helped him up, with his arm around her neck._

_"Welcome to the future,_ brother _," he told Kelly as they passed._

_His voice was weaker, more tired than Charlotte had heard in years. Likely since she fished him out of the ocean to prevent him from drowning, all those years ago…_

* * *

"The machine emits radiation that triggers mutation in ordinary human beings," she explained.

"But the mutation is unnatural," Jean threw in. "Kelly's body is rejecting it. His cells began to break down almost immediately."

Beside her, Scott asked, "What effect does the radiation have on mutants?"

"There appears to be none," Charlotte mused. "But I fear it will seriously harm any normal person exposed to it."

Logan's thoughts were a jumble as he tried to untangle the plan behind all of this. "But what does Magneto want with Rogue?"

"I don't—" she paused mid sentence. "Actually… It seemed to be that the machine was drawing its power from Erik. It nearly killed him in the process. I believe he's going to use Rogue in his place."

There was a pause as they took in the full ramification of this.

"Cyclops, you and Storm ready the jet to find Rogue," she directed. "Jean, get Logan a uniform."

"Whoa," Scott objected. "He's not coming with us, is he?"

She nodded. "Yes," Charlotte replied in a clipped tone, leaving no room for argument.

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but he'll endanger the mission."

Logan turned quickly. "Hey, I wasn't the one who gave the train station a new sunroof, pal."

 _Logan!_ she snapped.

Scott was unperturbed. "No, you were the one who stabbed Rogue through the chest."

Jean's eyes widened. "Scott—"

"Hey, why don't you take your mission and shove it up—"

Storm flew into the room, her mind panicking. "Senator Kelly is dead," she reported. The argument fell silent.

"I'm going to find her," Charlotte told them firmly. "Settle this."

 _Erik, what are you doing?_ She thought to herself as she made her way to Cerebro. She slipped the helmet on and began the machine, when—

A cry of pain escaped her. It felt like red-hot spikes were being shoved into her skull—not as bad as a coin through the forehead or a bullet to her spine, but—

She shoved the helmet from her head, dizzy with pain as she tried to leave. Slumped forward, she only managed to tumble from the wheelchair to the floor heavily.

Her temple connected with the platform painfully.

 _Jean—_ she cried out.

Black.


	5. Every Breath We Drew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "That is precisely the thing you do not understand. I am doing this for Charlotte and all the other mutants out there, including yourself."

  
_"And remember when I moved in you?_   
_The holy dark was moving to_   
_And every breath we drew was Hallelujah_   
_Hallelujah, Hallelujah_   
_Hallelujah, Hallelujah…"_   


**~ "Hallelujah", Leonard Cohen**

* * *

In the darkness, some words filtered into her mind, like spots of sunshine on a cloudy day.

There was yelling from Wanda, Pietro, Jean, Storm, and Scott as they rushed to her aid…

It was a struggle to listen, to try and focus…It made her weary. She wondered if Erik felt this tired after his attempt with his machine…

Distantly, she heard Scott. " _You've taught me everything in my life that's worth knowing…if anything happens, I'll take care of them—the twins and everyone else._ "

She found comfort in these words.

There was only silence afterward. She hoped that meant they were trying to stop Erik.

* * *

_Would the Wolverine ever learn_? Erik thought as he sensed the mutant's signature adamantium nearby. Getting him out of the way was simple and, in the metal structure the X-Men stood in, pinning the rest was hardly more difficult.

"Ah, my brothers, welcome," he greeted dryly as he levitated down to them. The magnetokinetic looked to Logan. "You. Hm, let's point those claws of yours in a safer direction," he murmured and maneuvered the mutant's arms to his chest. Should he attempt to utilize his claws, he would instead impale himself upon them. _Child's play_.

"You had better close your eyes," he advised Scott Summers as Sabretooth removed the visor from his head.

The boy's determination wasn't so easily abated. "Storm," he said. "Fry 'em."

Erik snorted.

The youngest of the three women sighed loudly. "Scott, we're all trapped inside one immense copper conductor," Wanda told him but regarded Erik coolly. He could see the accusation in his daughter's eyes.

He felt a twinge of guilt for this, for fighting his own children like this. The possibility that his plan might kill the humans nearby didn't bother him; seeing the accusation in his daughter's eyes—which were Charlotte's eyes—did. For a single moment, he hesitated.

The twins had always been a source of some guilt for him. He'd originally thought that he would stop fighting this ceaseless war in only a few years and return to Charlotte and their children. Instead, a couple years had slowly grown into a couple decades. Charlotte and he, earlier on, had corresponded frequently and he got updates as the twins grew. Whenever the chance arose, they met, so Wanda and Pietro could meet him. He never wanted to be a stranger to them, but situations arose and he had little choice but to remain distant. Once they were a bit older, enough to understand why he wasn't always there, he began to write to them as well as Charlotte. Azazel had been irreplaceable for his tolerance for delivering their correspondence and for keeping it a secret. He'd been killed in a skirmish only a handful of years ago; it was only then that he had not been able to safely contact Charlotte any longer. And the twins had, as they had fully matured into adults, nearly become strangers.

Erik forced himself not to linger on that thread of guilt. Not now.

"Indeed," he said to Wanda and turned to sneered slightly at Cyclops. "I thought you lived at a school."

He turned his attention elsewhere and reached for the earpiece. "Mystique," he said to it. There was no response. "Mystique?" _She's down then_ , he thought with a slight grimace.

"I've seen Senator Kelly," spoke the telepath in training.

"So, the good senator survived his fall?" he asked curiously. "And to swim to shore? He's become even more powerful than I could have imagined."

" _He's dead_ ," she snapped.

"It's true," Ororo Monroe spoke up. "I saw him die—like those people down there will die."

Erik leaned forward. "Are you sure you saw what you saw?" he asked and stepped back to address them all. "Why do none of you understand what I'm trying to do? Those people down there, they can control our fate— _and the fate of every other mutant out there!_ " he exclaimed.

"Soon, our fate will be theirs," he added confidently.

Pietro, pinned to the wall beside his sister, snarled. " _You bastard_ —you'll kill them!"

"A risk I must take," he replied calmly.

"What would she think?" the redheaded Maximoff asked lowly, accusingly. Erik looked to her curiously. "What would Charlotte think?"

He drew in a deep breath. "That is precisely the thing you do not understand. I am doing this for Charlotte and all the other mutants out there, including yourself."

It was then that the girl above decided to speak up. "Help! _Please help me!_ "

Wolverine glared furiously. "You're so fulla shit!" he spat. "If you were really so righteous, it'd be you in that thing."

" _Help! Somebody help me!_ "

The magnetokinetic did not reply to Logan, merely levitating himself up into the air, under the fireworks now coloring the sky, to the statue's torch.

After opening the hatch, he looked down to the girl inside, staring at him in fear.

"I'm sorry, my dear," he told the girl as he reached forward. She looked to him in fear, pleading. "Don't do this…" He placed his hands on her head. There was pain in him as he felt his magnetism leaving him, and sheer exhaustion as his energy fled him.

The girl screamed and he stumbled back, out onto the balcony, where he collapsed against the rail.

From below, he heard shouts and Sabretooth's roaring—until said mutant was sent hurtling from the Statue of Liberty…and the Wolverine came flying to the device, carried by the wind.

Erik reached out, forcing his power to work and bend Logan's claws. If he failed now…

And then he was struck by Scott Summer's energy beams, sending him falling to the platform below.

He blacked out.

* * *

The magnetokinetic woke up minutes later in time to see the X-Men's jet leaving and to hear the sound of the Coast Guard boats pulling up to the island with the authorities pouring onto the island.

Exhausted by transferring his power to the girl, he had no energy left to attempt escape now.

Erik closed his eyes and allowed himself to be pulled back to unconsciousness.

 _I've failed once more, Liebling_.

* * *

Charlotte woke to find the twins beside her in the hospital room.

"Welcome back," her daughter told her. "I knew you'd find your way."

The professor smiled tiredly. "How did we do?"

She never had quite broke that habit of asking questions to which she already knew the answer.

Pietro gave her a wide grin. Wanda glanced over and Charlotte followed her gaze to find Logan unconscious and bloody on the cot across from her.

"Good," she said quietly. "I can fulfill my promise to him after all."


	6. All I Ever Learned from Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte recovers and has a conversation about her and Erik's relationship.

  
_"…Maybe there's a god above_   
_And all I ever learned from love_   
_Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you_   
_And it's not a cry you can hear at night,_   
_It's not somebody who's seen the light_   
_It's cold and it's a broken Hallelujah_   
_Hallelujah, Hallelujah_   
_Hallelujah, Hallelujah_   
_Hallelujah, Hallelujah_   
_Hallelujah, Hallelujah"_   


**~ "Hallelujah", Leonard Cohen  
**

* * *

Two days later found Charlotte exhausted but finally able to rest. It had taken time to settle the ruffled feathers the near-success of Erik's plan had caused. Of course, she was known as a mutant expert.

It was no surprise when she was contacted about assisting with creating a prison that would hold Magneto. With a reluctant heart that screamed ' _Traitor!_ ', she gave vague advice that Magneto's powers concerned only metal and magnetism. They designed and created the plastic and glass prison from there. Charlotte felt no less guilty for it.

That stress did nothing to alleviate the bone-deep exhaustion that pervaded her entirely. The painkillers she took did nothing for the constant headache that lingered.

Jean worried enough about the professor's health for the two of them. Despite how much she fretted that the sabotage of Cerebro might have done her serious harm, Charlotte merely rested, fully confident that the side effects would fade in time.

She didn't say that her lack of worry for that was because she knew Erik would never have done that unless he knew for certain it would not do her harm, despite his recently-increased streak of violence. He would never have risked it. Charlotte knew this, but the others did not have the same faith in his affection for her. They all seemed to think Erik was one day going to take advantage of that faith Charlotte had in him in order to kill his supposed 'enemy'.

(Neither did she allow herself to even admit to herself that—were he to actually do that and betray and kill her—she would rather it be in an indirect manner like this rather than him, face-to-face, killing her directly. She'd rather die a thousand times than look him in the eye as he killed her directly, to see his betrayal plainly before her, even if it was only once. Seeing that betrayal, looking him in the eye as he killed her, would break her. Utterly, completely.)

Her children did not feel the same.

Days after she had woken and Jean had cleared her to start working again, the telepath found herself in her sitting room with the twins. Pietro was annoyed and upset, his sister unsettled.

The telepath watched calmly as her son paced.

"I don't get it, Mum!" he exclaimed, words slightly British (Wanda had more of an English accent than her brother's middling American-Londoner intonation.) "He nearly kills you just to get you out of the way so you don't interfere with his plans— _and you're not even upset, not even a bit?_ "

The professor sighed and picked up her cup of fresh earl grey tea. "Of course I'm upset, _mein schatz_." She paused to sip at the hot beverage. "But were I to take this personally every time something of this nature occurs, I would surely be heartbroken by now."

" _Aren't you_?" he demanded furiously.

Charlotte's eyebrows rose quickly in surprise. Wanda, from her spot looking out the window, turned abruptly. " _Pietro!_ " she hissed. "Don't—"

But he waved her off. "It's true—you both know it. He has _always_ done this and _always_ will do this! He carelessly thinks only about the Brotherhood and fighting humans—he don't even care if he hurts you or us in the mean time! Even when you don't get hurt, whenever something involving him comes up, I can see that depression set in. You don't even show it! You never blame him, never get angry, never— _anything!_ All you do is say 'He's doing what he thinks is right'—or, 'He's trying to protect us'. After everything he's done—after paralyzing you and abandoning you and Uncle Hank, Alex, and Sean in Cuba, after becoming a terrorist, after becoming your enemy— _you still love him_."

Sorrowfully, she closed her eyes and shook her head. "Oh, Pietro. As much of him that I see in you, I fear you may never understand your father. Or me. For him, the anti-mutant crisis is very similar to his childhood when the Nazis were taking power in Germany. He sees many of the same warning signs and fears mutants being captured and taken away like his family and other Jews were. He hears talk of scientists and theories about mutants and thinks about the experimentation he suffered while in Auschwitz. He sees the news of mutants being killed simply for their genetics and fears that one day, it may be me who is shot because I say something that I shouldn't know—or your sister getting taken away because she accidentally affected the outcome of the lottery—or you, beaten because you moved quicker than is natural. He remembers his mother being shot before him and fears that, one day, it might be you or me.

"Neither of us… _wanted_ to be this involved. I didn't want to _need to_ teach children how to defend themselves. Erik does not want to hurt any innocents. I don't want to be in charge of the X-Men; nor does your father want to be the Brotherhood's leader. We were drafted into this supposed-war. We don't want to fight it nor fight against each other. But…if we don't fight, who will? One day…one day, when it comes time for Magneto to hang up his cape and helmet and for the X-Men to retire their uniforms, then…then we will seek each other out and, I believe, have a very long conversation about our futures."

The boy gave a huff of aggravation. "Mum, he _left_ you on a _Cuban beach_ during the missile crisis, after _shooting you_ in the back, _paralyzing you_ —and after he'd knocked you up, but you—"

Her tea cup fell from her hands and shattered on the floor, silencing the room. The professor was white as a sheet as she stared at him, face indecipherable. His sister looked horrified.

"Mum—I'm—I—"

" _Don't_ ," she whispered, quickly schooling her features sadly. "It's alright, Pietro. You did not mean to bring that up. But…I love your father. I can barely recall a time that I did not. It has been forty odd years. Were it not for this 'war', I do believe he would be here with us. For now…all I can do is wait. He has done terrible things but so have I. You forget it was I who sold him out to the government. Erik has never breathed a word of my being a mutant. And every time, he goes out of his way to ensure I am out of the way and safe. Like recently—he could have killed me. He could have done many, many things. But he did not.

"For now…not taking it personally is the only thing I can do to not hate him…or myself."


	7. Hallelujah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A promise she intended to keep.

**Chapter 7**

**_“Love is not a victory march.  
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah.”_ **

**~ “Hallelujah”, Leonard Cohen**

* * *

After Logan woke, that was exactly what she did and told him of her suspicions involving an abandoned military base near Alkali Lake. He left soon after on Scott’s motorcycle. (To her amusement and Scott's annoyance.)

They listened on the news as the Mutant Registration Act did not pass because of the sudden reversal of Senator Kelly’s position on it. “Senator Kelly” who she could recognize as Raven in disguise.

Which led her to here—Erik’s plastic prison.

As she set up the plastic chessboard, Erik smiled slightly at her in greeting. “I don’t suppose you’re here to help me break out,” he said wryly.

She chuckled fondly but sadly. “Unfortunately not, Erik.”

“I didn’t think so,” he replied and watched her make the first move. “Are you well?”

Charlotte visibly paused. “Ah, you mean your trick with Cerebro. Yes, I have recovered. Thank you.”

He nodded. “Good. I intended for it to be so,” the prisoner paused. “How are the twins?”

Affection warmed his thoughts. _They’ve grown_ , he thought to her, _Since I saw them last_.

Despite herself, she smiled slightly. “They are well. Wanda…well, she’s as levelheaded as ever. And I see more of their father in Pietro every day. ”

“Not too much, I hope,” he replied, bittersweet.

As she moved her queen, he then inquired, “The others?”

The telepath glanced at him. “Well enough,” she replied neutrally.

“And the girl?”

This made her freeze completely. “Don’t,” she said roughly. “Don’t ask me about any of my students, _my children_ , you set up to have killed—purposefully, when she had no defense.”

Erik nodded. He could understand that. Despite that the students weren’t her offspring, she was as protective of those children as she was to their first group, so long ago. She was still an angry mother bear when it came to her students, who were as much her children as the twins.

 _My apologies_ , he told her. He was surprised to find that he meant it.

They played in silence for ten minutes until he can no longer restrain his question.

“Does it ever wake you at night?” he asked her, “The feeling that someday they will pass that foolish law or one just like it and come for you, your children, your students?”

He met her gaze. “It does indeed,” she replied, voice soft with her sincerity.

After taking one of her pawns, he asked, “What do you do when you wake up to that?”

Charlotte smiled humorlessly. “I’ll feel a great swell of pity for the poor soul that comes to my school looking for trouble.”

Erik stared at her, as if trying to read her thoughts.

 _I’m sorry it has come to this,_ she told him quietly.

He chuckled. _No prison stands forever. Especially not a plastic prison. And for now, this is as good a place as any to be._

 _Until Raven can spring you, Erik?_ She hypothesized and shook her head. _That was not to which I referred, however. I meant this, us, on different sides—fighting against each other._

He did not reply until after two turns between them. The only sound was the movement of the chess pieces on the board.

As he paused to consider the board, Charlotte studied her old friend. Her blue eyes traced his aged but handsome features, his near-white hair, his grey-green eyes.

She suddenly felt every year of her age—so tired, so old. Her own hair had long since gone completely grey; it was now just past her shoulders, curls now tame compared to that in her youth, the rich brown now completely silver. Lines were etched into her face: crow’s feet around her eyes, her forehead bore lines that betrayed her stress. Once, she might have been called beautiful; now, she was wrinkled and grey, thinner and smaller now than she could ever recall. Charlotte felt so old, so tired, so weary of the fighting.

Looking at her old friend, she felt suddenly robbed. They could have had a life together, had a family, made her school more of a home. They might have been married, might have raised the twins together, might have lived their lives together and grown old together.

Instead, they had been drafted into this seemingly ceaseless war as generals on opposing sides. Erik had ran the Brotherhood, struck back against anti-mutant prejudice and violence, had her sister with him for all these years too. Charlotte had ran the school, raised students, protected children, led the X-Men.

It had been a good life, but it might have been a great one were it not for their damn pride that refused to allow them to end this.

In that moment, the telepath knew that if she had one wish in the world, it would be to go back and fix this, to put aside her pride, to convince Erik to do the same, to live their lives together and happy rather than far apart and longing. The idea of a whole life with him was almost too sweet to imagine and she tucked the thought aside lest the bittersweet taste of it prove too tempting.

Eventually, he projected to her and returned her mind to the present.

 _I am glad the girl is alive and well,_ he thought to her.

 _I apologize,_ he added eventually, _for tampering with Cerebro. I did not intent for it to harm you, only remove you from the equation until the fighting is over._

Charlotte smiled. _Still trying to protect me, Erik?_ she asked fondly. A quick flicker of images, of memories followed—

_The first night they met, he glared at any of the crewmen who dared leer at her as she huddled in her soaked, clinging clothes…_

_…Him watching her vigilantly as she tried Cerebro for the first time…_

_…Training the children (now adults, left the nest), watching over her even as she sometimes endangered herself while doing so, like the once with Alex…_

_…his scream of “_ No! _” as she fired the gun at her temple point blank for him to stop…_

_…making sure she stayed in the crashed jet, where her safety was all but ensured, while the others fought off Shaw and his henchmen…_

_…holding her after she was shot, cradling her protectively…_

_…storming to the Xavier mansion, worried for her, despite that he might be attacked for doing so, just because she had not replied to his letter…_

_…infiltrating Stryker’s base without her, for fear of her being captured and experiment on like they had on him, like the Nazis had…_

He stilled for a long moment. Finally he nodded. _Yes, I suppose I do. I try to protect you whenever I can, but I feel as if I only ever manage to do is hurt you._

As the guard entered to help her leave, he asked, “Why do you come in here, Charlotte?”

“Why do you ask questions to which you already know the answers, love?” the telepath replied with a nostalgic tone.

He smiled. “Oh, yes. You continue to search for hope.”

She nodded and sent him another memory, of a blissful afternoon in the mansion before Cuba— _her discovering a lost memory of his mother. Charlotte, so much younger and more whole, told him sincerely, “There is so much more to you than you know. Not just pain and anger. There’s good too—I felt it.”_

It tightened her throat but she added, _I still feel it there, my love._

He faltered at the memory, but he wasn’t finished. “You know this plastic prison of theirs won’t hold me forever. The war is still coming, Liebling, and I intend to fight it. By any means necessary.”

The professor leaned over closer to him. “And I will always be there, love,” she promised.

It was a promise Charlotte intended to keep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus ends this installment of "A Thousand Years"


End file.
